The frustration of setbacks and the art of recovery

I never realized until recently that handling setbacks is one of the trickiest and most important things you can learn on a personal health journey.  Relatively speaking, getting into the habit of daily workouts and eating well is easy, and it isn't until you hit a bump in the road that you realize you have a lot of learning to do.  When I hurt my back over two weeks ago (one of the many, many times I have been sidelined due to my degenerated disc issues), I had become borderline obsessive about getting out every day to jog and really enjoyed my weekly torturous personal training sessions.

Now it is hard to know what to do with myself.  My back can't hold up to anything very vigorous and jogging seems to make it tighter and more sore even with lots of cool down stretching.  But the problem is that taking walks when you are accustomed to running seems soooooo boring and takes way too long!  It is one thing if it is a beautiful Sunday and you have nothing else to do but walk the parkway for 5 miles with the dogs but that is a rare occurence.  I swear I can feel fat settling in my stomach every day that I am not working out hard!  And eating less is just not an option.  I mean, come on.  It is candy season and I love candy and even though I have none in my own house, co-workers bring it in daily to share in the office and there is no chance I'm going to walk by the delicious tootsie rolls and laffy taffy and cute mini little butter fingers and not gobble them up!

Realistically, I've really only gained maybe a couple pounds and I'm sure it will come off fast as soon as I am back in my usual routine but I can't seem to get back to that normalcy.  Each day I think my back is maybe getting better it goes back to being sore again.  What is worse is that it makes me so paranoid and cautious I don't know when it is okay to push it a little bit and when I have to baby it so I end up babying it all the time.  Last night I returned to personal training after having two weeks off and it was frustratingly hard.  I can't believe that after such a short time I backslid so much in my condition and endurance.

Now, that I've vented, I suppose it is time to start looking at the bright side.  At least I know I will eventually return to "normal" and I'm not permenently injured.  All in all, my back has been so much better since I've gotten in good shape and it has "gone out" less and less.  The dogs really love our walks since I allow them a little more slack, lots more leash and they get to sniff to their hearts content (that is until they reach the end of their 16 foot line - that is our rule!).  When we jog it is much more regimented and they must keep a steady pace and not dawdle.  Also, I'm hoping that because I'm having back trouble now, I will be a-ok by the time we leave for Long Beach to the AKC Agility Invitational in a few weeks -- Brag is #1 in his breed and I don't want to be slowed down by pain!  Finally, I think the best news is that I haven't thrown in the towel and hibernated on the couch like I've wanted to.  Each night when I leave work I have a war of wills with myself over whether I'm going to take the dogs out for some exercise or whether I'm going to park it on the comfy couch for the evening and so far the "good" me has been victorious each night.  Here's hoping "good" Jen will prevail again tonight!